Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Do they make kryptonite underwear?

fail owned pwned pictures
see more pwn and owned pictures


I'm pretty sure the kid in this picture is hoping to hell that's what his are made out of.


Yeah, this a real comic book cover. Someone explain HOW it got passed the editors?


This is just all sorts of wrong.

Whoopsie!

I missed the Sunday Ramble. Oh well. Deal with it - I am.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Was that a compliment?

I was called a bizarre, off-beat version of the missing link today.

Ummmm ....

thank you?

My Job - My Life

As you know, I work for a music company.

It's one of those places where you can get into a lot of trouble if you are caught NOT listening to music while working. I'm dead serious. It's even part of our annual review. That's messed up.

It's like working for McDonald's and getting in trouble for not eating their "heart attack in a bag" food.

Anyway (Pig's fave word), today was a banner day at work. I had to finish a report, which had a 5:00 PM deadline, and it was in no way, shape, or form gelling together for me. Oh yeah, I was ticked. I was cussing up a storm which prompted the ominous voice on the other side of my cube to say, "Maidy's in a good mood."

*sticks middle finger up in the air*

I was rampant. I felt the "postal" gene in my head click over to the ON side.

I

was

not

happy.

Then, like a sign from some deity, the loudspeakers kicked on and the whole company was filled with the Ramones, "I Wanna Be Sedated".

My mood completely changed as I mentally rocked out at my desk.

Music truly does have charm to soothe the savage Maidy.

Still never got the report done.

Homework

This was tonight's conversation with the girl while going over her homework for kindergarten.

Me: OK, pumpkin. You color the spaces that equal one green, two red, three leave alone, four yellow, and five brown.

Gem: OK, mommy.

Me: Now, you understand what you have to do? You have to add the numbers together and the answer is the color.

Gem (with attitude): I KNOW that, Mommy.

Me: OK, OK, just checking. So, *points* this one says three plus two. What does that equal?

Gem: Brown

Me: No, honey. It's five and five is brown.

Gem: That's what I said! Brown!

Me: No, baby. It's five and five is brown.

Gem: Right. Three and two is brown.

Me: No, sweetie. It's ...

*thinks*

Me: Ummm, nevermind. You get it.


I really wanted to go into an explanation that she was using logic, but I'm just happy the kid has her colors correct.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

One of the reasons why I love him

This actually happened a few years ago, but it's still something he'd do today.


Me (doing something benign I assume and screwing it up): Grrrr. Fuck a duck!

Geo: Quack! Quack!

Monday, March 16, 2009

Back to work tomorrow

Yeah, I didn't go in today. I had a doctor's appointment this morning which stretched into the afternoon. After that, I didn't have the mental energy to deal with data and deadlines.

*sigh*

Not much of a choice but to suck it up and jump back into everything tomorrow.

On the upside, I have to take off from work on Friday. On the downside, it's for medical reasons again.

Ah well.


Criminal in Training

The other day my *ahem* adorable son got a hold of a pen. How he got it is still a mystery. I think he has a stash of them somewhere in the house. Anyway (Pig's fave word), he is not allowed to have anything that can be considered a weapon and a pen would fall under that category. So, it was my sworn duty to get the pen away from said child.

I looked at him and yelled, "JT!!"

The poor boy got startled and jumped.

The thing he did next astounded me.

He looked at the pen, threw it in one direction, and ran in the other.

*blink*

I looked at Gem who watched the whole thing from the couch and said to her, "Did you see that, pumpkin? That's what criminals do with weapons when being chased by the police."

I can already predict I'll be on speed dial at the Dean of Students for whatever school he will be in.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Maidy's Sunday Ramble 03/15/2009

That's right, minions. I'm back and so is the ramble.

Let's see, it's been about seven months since I have even wrote a real ramble so I may be a bit rusty at this. Just bear with me.


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My daughter talks a lot. She gets it from Geo. Majority of the time I have no idea what the hell she is saying. It all starts out the same way.

"Ummm, mom? I blah blah blah blah ... *trails off into something inaudible* ..."

I swear to God it's like she was told if she stopped talking, she'd die.


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The girl has been preoccupied with death lately. I don't know what prompted it but it's getting quite ghoulish with her.


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I have a new job as most of you do not know. Yeah, that other job I had for like EVER, the one that I hated but stayed with since they paid me to do nothing, laid me off last June. Pretty nice of them since they probably could have fired me for about a gazillion things.

Anyway, I work for a music company now. We are in the field of broadcast media. That, my friends, is all I will give in identifying where I work.

What about my job? I love it. It's high stress and demanding and I seriously love every second of it. I'm sure as the days trudge along, I'll have more blog fodder relating to it.


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I bought a new sippy cup for JT today. It 's spill-proof, leak-proof, and break-proof. Those are three elements that are key to things we give to that boy.

There's just one slight problem ... I can't get the damn thing open. I twisted, pushed, slammed it against the counter, and the damn lid won't budge. Yeah, it's leak-proof alright ... because you can't get any liquids in the stupid thing.


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JT sneezed in my face. That was pleasant.


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Has anyone out there watched Foamy the Squirrel? If not, I highly recommend you watch some of his rants.


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Why doesn't iTunes have AC/DC? They have freaking Led Zeppelin and The Beatles, but they don't have AC/DC.

That just seems messed up to me.

HEY APPLE!!! PAY THE DAMN LICENSING FEE AND GET ON WITH IT!!


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I bet you never knew that leaving a cup of Dunkin Donuts coffee on your car roof and then start driving away can cause a big ole messy and unfortunate accident? And that's especially so when the cup was on the driver's side and it spilled all over the roof and cascaded down the door. Made wanting to get out of the car to survey the damage a bit treacherous.


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You know the mother's curse?

"Someday I hope you have kids JUST LIKE YOU"?

Yeah, it really works.

To those of you without children and heard that uttered by your mum at least once in your lifetime, you better hope to your god of choice that you were a child with a relatively good disposition or else you are so totally screwed.


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Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Friends

Amazingly enough I do have them. You know, those people who I can truly count on when life goes completely awry?

I just need to reconnect.

*checks blog's log event*

It seems I have one that remembers I existed in the blogging realm.

*huggers Eros*

Blogging? What's this blogging?

Maybe I should take it back up again. Stupid RPG online games have melted my brain long enough.

*wonders if she should tell people she's back*