Monday, April 03, 2006

Morning drives with the Dinks

My child is a space case. She can stare off into space and I swear it takes a voice above 80 dBs to bring her back to Earth. In the car, I am constantly checking the child safety mirror to make sure she's even in the backseat.

Of course, there are the times she.just.won't.shut.up.

Today was both.

The morning commute started off with her brain well past Pluto. I yelled her name a couple of times. When she finally snapped out of it, she looked at me and said "What?"

She's practicing to be a teenager, I know it.

I then regretted snapping the child out of her self-induced hypnosis. My gosh. She just kept yapping about anything and everything.

Then there is the "point out everything we see and let the world know what it is" thingy. With each thing she saw, she would announce her discovery. My job was to acknowledge.


"Mommy, there's a slhrfnwealewio." I just say "Really?!" when I can't understand her. It saves her the trouble of her repeating since I probably won't understand her the second time anyway.

"Mommy, that's a square." That's any random square object.

"Is that a square there, Dink?"

"Nooooooo. That is a cloud machine." That can be any random smokestack or Limerick nuclear power plant.

"Mommy, there's a tiger." Tiger Schilman Karate. We pass it every morning. She says that and I growl. She gets a giggle out of it.

"Mommy, there's a fish." That would be the Bonefish Grill. And it's not just a fish, but a dead fish. Sorry, folks, but anyplace that uses a fish skeleton as it's mascot won't see me in their dining room.

"Mommy, a bird. I have to shoot it!"

???

"You have to shoot it, sweetie?"

"Yeah! Shoo! Shoo!"

Ohhhh, shoo the bird! For moment I pictured my child putting a feathered being in crosshairs.

"Mommy, it's Bob the Builder!" Part of the road we travel is being widened. When we drive through the construction zone, Dinks shouts out Bob the Builder at the glimpse of all construction vehicles. It's about a seven mile stretch. That's a lot of shout outs.

This morning, I decided to play along in a sing-song loudish voice.

"Mommy, it's Bob the Builder!"

"You're right, Dink! It is! Dink, can we build it?!"

"No."

What? That's not the right answer.

Again, with more enthusiasm.

"Dink, can we fix it?!"

"No."

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh-kaaaaaaaay.

"Mommy, I don't want to talk now so you be quiet."

Sigh.

So much for playing along.

Then, she's back in space again. Someday, I want to visit wherever she goes to. It must be nice. She goes there a lot.

11 comments:

Whinger said...

Ahh...the teenaged toddler.

:)

Maidink said...

I'm tellin' ya. All she needs now is a circle of friends I won't care for.

CeCe said...

That sure made me giggle out loud! My little one just started that TODAY, so it's funny to read about yours doing it. I was sitting in the back seat of the car with her, (the dog was in the front with the hubby) and she just totally spaced out for a good 5 minutes. No noises, not much looking around, blank look, and just repeatedly sucking her lip in and out. It was odd, but very amusing to watch! Then she snapped out of it and babbled and screached for the rest of our trip out!

Mr. Fabulous said...

It IS nice. I think I've seen her there. I frequently go there while I'm at work. Just sit back and zone out into a trance...

It's a bold adventure.

Maidink said...

CeCe ~ Spaced out children are quite amusing. Nothing phases them. Well, almost nothing. Drop a doughnut in front of the child and see how long the spacing will last.

Mr Fab ~ Next time you see her, tell her she has to pick up her crayons. Thanks!

Charlie on the PA Turnpike said...

Shoo{t} the birds, but giggle at the tiger?

Something not right there...

C:

Maidink said...

Charlie, she's three. Nothing makes sense in her world. :)

Actually, I think the "shooing" of the birds comes from "Bob the Builder". there is a scarecrow named Spuds on the show. His job is to "shoo" away the birds.

And she giggles at me! I would think a real tiger would scare the crap out of her. We'll find out when we go to the zoo. Boy, that should be a doosey of a post.

Spikey1 said...

Yep. I get that Mommy, I don't want to talk now so you be quiet line most mornings.. Well except the mommy part!

(Too cryptic?)

Sangroncito said...

..."so YOU be quiet"...very cute!

Rowan said...

haha my doodlebug is very similar to your dinks it'd seem.

He even gets angry at times when I try to join in with his playing (like your bob eg.) and will shout I said NO! No DO! (meaning -- shutup!)

I always enjoy reading about your adventures with Dinks in tow, perhaps I will write an adventure up myself later on...I have a doozy I can think of that happened recently!

mdmhvonpa said...

If your Dinks and my Alexis ever meet, the critical mass will certainly rend the fabric of reality to tiny shreads of string-particles.